While the kitchen is mostly white and beige, the rest of the house is all color, starting with the living room, or the “Garden Room.” Complete with a double-sided green velvet couch, matching chairs and accents, and floral wallpaper, the living room will delight anyone who ever dreamed of going to the Secret Garden without actually going outdoors.

The room is part bath and part sitting room, featuring a bath, two pink chairs, a fireplace, vanities made out of commodes styled after those of French King Louis XVI in Versailles and featuring swan taps — a request from Harbour, apparently.

(There is also a bigger swan tap in the bathtub, or as Allen calls it, “The big daddy swan.”) These details are all worth unpacking, but the real head-scratchers are the floral carpeting.

The accompanying AD article assured fans worried about this detail that “the toilet and shower are in a different room altogether.” But, respectfully, I am still concerned about the carpet surrounding the bathtub — something the CDC actively cautions against on .

The couple refrained from telling AD what is actually inside the “fridge from outer space,” as Harbour called it, but I’m not entirely convinced that the giant structure isn’t a cryogenic pod used to keep Austin Powers alive.

The town house also includes a windowless master bedroom painted flamingo pink, which Allen calls a “bed-womb,” two walk-in closets (guess who’s is bigger), a media room with a tiger print carpet and tiger print sofa, and a personal sauna and cold plunge tub out back.